OUTING TWO: QPR VS. HUDDERSFIELD

A sunny Sunday in West London

When I wrote my first blog, I thought I was getting myself into a nice rhythm of lamenting rain and reflecting fondly upon the hooligan’s predictable word choice. As you will find out, one has emerged as the frontrunner in the “Chief English Football Staple” race. At first, nothing about Outing Two bore any resemblance to Outing One (my trip to Reading). The journey was relatively quick and required neither crossing motorways nor navigating rural bus routes. QPR and Huddersfield are both in the second division of English Football, confusingly known as the Championship. Unlike teams aspiring for promotion to the Premier League at the end of this season, QPR and Huddersfield are desperately trying to avoid relegation; if they fail to do so, they will possibly join our friends Derby and Reading in League One. However, the most notable difference between the two days was the weather. I will let the picture below do the bulk of the speaking but to put it simply, most West London days do not look like this:

The Home Stadium and The Guests of Honor

This was my second trip to QPR’s stadium (Loftus Road) and my first occasion came nearly three years ago with Alex (whom I introduced to you all last week), one of my good friends Henry, and a woman whom I was dating at the time. That night was: cold, occasionally windy, and intermittently rainy. So to discover that The Loft, as it is known, can look resplendent in natural light was a wonderful realization. I count myself among the lucky few who have made such a discovery. This journey to West London featured a new cast of characters, all of whom are attending LSE for grad school, and two of whom are UNC-Chapel Hill alums. One of them has size 14 feet but he did not go to UNC. Their names are Drew, Celeste, and Zane. We were all given free scarves but because this happened without prior warning, Drew and Zane had already pledged their support to QPR in the form of two scarves they bought at the team store. I would like to think all of us enjoyed the day out in White City (West London) but I will not speak for them. I do know they find the Football Hooligan’s Language as amusing in its limitations as I do. More on that soon.

The Clubs’ Recent History

Though QPR and Huddersfield do not have the same level of ownership drama as last week’s hosts Reading do, they are mired in somewhat of a plateaued fall from grace. Both clubs have spent time in the Premier League over the last decade, with Huddersfield most recently making an appearance in the top flight during the 2018-19 season. For the football-crazed among you, that Huddersfield side featured the marauding Dane Philip Billing, the very bald metronome Aaron Mooy, and the Curaçaoan creative spark Juninho Bacuña. My apologies- had to appeal to the nerds briefly.

The Match Summary

One of the great joys of attending lower-league football games is that you can sit so close to the players that when you shower them with praise and/or abuse (if you’re into that sort of thing) they hear you. We had amazing seats for the second game running and found ourselves situated right next to the away fans who had traveled from the far reaches of Northern England to cheer on their beloved Huddersfield Town. The game itself was the epitome of Championship football: absolutely nothing happened in the first half, very little happened for about 75% of the second half, and then in quick succession with time winding down we got two goals. Jack Rudoni opened the scoring for Huddersfield in the 86th minute before Kenneth Paal (my friend Drew’s favorite player) scored the equalizer in the 96th minute, just before the final whistle was blown. As much pandemonium as the opener caused in the away end that was directly to our right, the equalizer caused twice as much mayhem across the ground. It is in these moments that you can aptly describe the celebrations as “limbs”- a reference to the waving and flailing and generally asynchronous bodily chaos that ensues after a team scores a late goal. In the second deck, you see the traveling away fans standing and chanting following their opener:

Now it is time to dive into what I think is everybody’s favorite part:

The Day’s Details

Things We Discussed

1. The weather

   1. I’m telling you, this was a warranted discussion…it was really nice outside

2. The % of the stadium suffering from crippling hangovers

   1. …

3. The best players on the pitch

   1. Kenneth Paal on QPR, Sinclair Armstrong on QPR, Asmir Begovic on QPR, Jack Rudoni on Huddersfield, and Alex Matos on Huddersfield

4. Whether or not Asmir Begovic played for Chelsea as a backup goalkeeper during the 2015 season

   1. Local One (of the ‘Two Locals in front of us” duo mentioned below) said he absolutely did not

   2. He did

Things We Ate

1. One steak & ale pie

Things We Drank

1. Four bottles of water

2. One Diet Coke

Things We Bought

1. Two scarves

Things We Did Not Buy

1. Two (free) scarves

Things the Fans Sang

1. “Pedo pedo pedo”

   1. A Huddersfield fan favorite, sung in response to a QPR fan using a kazoo

2. “Pedo what’s the score”

   1. An evolution of Chant #1 sung during the 10 minutes that Huddersfield had a 1-0 lead

3. “Marti Cifuentes, Marti Cifuentes, he eats paella, he drinks Estrella, he hates fucking Chelsea”

   1. A nice way for the QPR fans to support their manager

4. “Ally ally oh, ally ally oh, QPR FC, from the White City”

   1. Honestly? Great chant

Things the Two Locals in Front of us Shouted

1. “Get back you cunt”

   1. In response to a throw-in that was nowhere near a dangerous area

2. “He’s got the touch of a pedo”

   1. In response to a miscontrolled pass

3. “Fucking hell you cannot be serious”

   1. In response to an incredibly routine substitution

4. “You fucking stink 14 I can smell you from here”

   1. In response to a corner kick taker being within earshot

5. “I love West London for the tits, the fannies, and the ragers”

   1. Speaks for itself. A glowing review.

Thank you, QPR.